Sunday, December 8, 2013

Comedy Delivered as Subtle as the Wind

Repetition is a double edge sword. When used by some people, especially those who have an ax to grind, it can bore you to tears, which is true in most cases. When used by professional comedians who know what they are doing, it can make you laugh which is true in some of the cases.

Sometimes, however, you face an odd situation where you feel like tears are about to flow down your cheeks but you're not sure if it's because you're bored or because you find the situation hilarious. In fact, you will feel you've been caught in a situation like this if you read the Washington Post editorial that came under the title: “The U.S. must confront the Egyptian military's push for authoritarian rule” and was published on December 7, 2013.

The title tells you what the editorial is about, so let me tell you how it ends before I even discuss it because this is how the effort of reading it can be transformed from a boring heavy moment to a light one; maybe even a funny one. Here is the passage that was heard or seen so many times previously in the Washington Post and in other publications: “The right U.S. strategy would be to suspend cooperation with the regime [in Egypt] until it adopts a genuine democratic path.”

What came to my mind upon reading that passage is a saying I have not heard in more than fifty years. It is an Egyptian saying which I doubt is known to any of the other Arab speaking societies – but I could be wrong. It goes something like this: “Father,” said the kid, “I am no longer going to sleep in the same room as you.” “Thank you my son,” came the response, “you just relieved me of your nightly farts.” It is that the people of Egypt have been calling on America to get out of there; and now it is America that wants to get out. Goodbye says America; good riddance says Egypt.

By now you are so tired of writers (editors, columnists, fly-by-night pundits and what have you) misrepresenting what happens in Egypt – because they don't know what is going on, or because they do not want to know – you cease to follow the logic as intended by them. You continue to read what they have created, however, in the hope that you may detect a subtle change in their presentation; one that would indicate a transformation in their brain pattern. Detecting something like this can fill you with a load of new insights, you know.

And the editors of the Washington Post do not disappoint you in this regard. Here is one change you will consider being good, bad or indifferent depending on your disposition. Speaking of the relationship between the Obama administration and Egypt, the editors of the Post write this: “It can accept that a key U.S. ally is ...” Did they call Egypt a key U.S. ally? Since when has it been the case? They don't just say an ally, which would have astonished many people only a few months ago; they say a KEY ally, which would have stunned even an Egyptian ambassador to America. It is difficult to see how this could have happened without a chemical upheaval being unleashed inside that skull of theirs. But who or what did it?

As you continue to read the editorial, you feel tickled enough to smile, chuckle and laugh … which you do not do because of what they say, but because of what they ignore saying while they say what they say. Here they are, editors of the Washington Post, premier publication in the capital city of America, and they haven't a clue as to how their own country is run, or how it should be run. And yet, they are absolutely certain about what is happening in Egypt, and what will happen there tomorrow, next year, during the next generation and all the generations after that.

Not only do these people claim to know what will happen, they also claim they know what should be deleted from Egypt's daily life, and what should be inserted in its stead.

To this, I can only say: Fart away, my son, fart away your stink – but do it not in my room.