Monday, February 24, 2020

The Salami Man deserves thirty thousand years

I never thought I'd live long enough to see the Salami Man being serenaded with a literary ode; much less serenaded by a former Canadian, now teaching law in America.

The boneheaded Canadian is F.H. (nothing to do with Fred Habachi) Buckley who wrote: “Michael Milken deserved Trump's pardon,” a piece that was published on February 23, 2020 in The Washington Examiner.

You guessed it, the salami man is Michael Milken, but you're probably too young to remember how and why he earned the nickname salami man. Actually, Milken never worked as a butcher of animals or human beings. But, for two reasons, you can think of him as having butchered ethical financing.

One reason is that, working as a hedge fund manager, Michael Milken fleeced the portfolios of everyone that came within his sight, including his clients. The other reason is that he invented the diabolic method of stuffing a junk-bond with few good securities and a whole bunch of worthless papers. He cut-up the bond into slices like a salami, and sold those slices to unsuspecting clients who thought they were buying a medley of good securities, unaware of the poison they were invited to bite into.

While selling that stuff to others and making big profits, Michael Milken established connection with traders in brokerage houses, who were in a position to know what companies will be taken over and when. In an operation called insider trading, Milken would buy shares in those companies, and make big profits there too after the companies are taken over. To be sure, insider trading is a crime for which Martha Stewart was nabbed, tried, convicted and sent to jail.

Michael Milken also was nabbed, tried, convicted and sent to jail. The difference between the two is that Martha Stewart did not engage in activities aimed at fleecing other people or institutions. What she did was act on the information she received from her broker, and sold a stock she already had. The broker's tip proved useful when the stock fell the next day, and she avoided losing about 50,000 dollars. For this, she was sent to jail for 5 months and put under supervision for two more years.

As to Michael Milken, he served only a two-year jail sentence, having actively schemed to steal billions upon billions of dollars from individuals, from pension funds and from charitable endowments. He stole so much, in fact, that he still has 3 to 4 billion dollars to his name after decades of living the high life. In addition, he was pardoned and Martha Stewart was not. She continues to be a convicted felon, but not him. Why? There is only one explanation: He is Jewish and she is Catholic.

Knowing that history, look how the shameless F.H. Buckley started his serenade of Michael Milken: “In 1990, Milken pleaded guilty to a securities offense. He was an outsider who took on a cozy establishment, beat them at their own game, and then was chewed up and spit out by a shameful criminal law system. His pardon was well-deserved … His rise was a great example of the American Dream”.

Instead of telling the truth about Milken engaging in insider trading, look how Buckley whitewashed his activities: “As his reputation for picking winners grew, Milken attracted some of the wealthiest venture capitalists as clients, people such as T. Boone Pickens and Carl Icahn, and Drexel became known as a firm that could raise billions of dollars to finance a takeover of a company within a matter of hours”.

And that's not all. We can get a sense of how far Buckley has gone to whitewash the criminal activities of Milken by comparing the way that he described those activities, and the scurrilous way by which he described the system of justice that convicted him for those activities.

First, the whitewash: “None of this won him any friends back east … he wasn't sharing his profits with Wall Street underwriters. There had been a tradition that lead underwriters on a deal would pass on part of the securities to be sold to other underwriters, but Milken wasn't having any of that. Drexel found it could raise billions of dollars to finance a takeover all by itself, and it did just that”.

Note that Buckley said not one word to call that situation what it was: A house of thieves who came upon a big jackpot, got greedy and started stabbing one another in the back, each trying to grab a big share of the loot and run. Instead of doing that, Buckley reserved his maligning attacks on the system of justice. That's what he said about it:

“The state used pressure to force Milken to plead guilty. It offered lenient plea bargains to liars in exchange for their promises to implicate Milken. It threatened to prosecute Milken's brother and sent FBI agents to visit his grandfather to get Milken to plead guilty. The state also waved the prospect of a racketeering order at Drexel, securing a guilty plea from it and cooperation in the prosecution of Milken”.

Martha Stewart was sent to jail a month for every 10,000 dollars she avoided losing. If we make it so that every dollar you avoid losing, is the same as stealing a dollar from an orphan, then justice requires that Michael Milken go to jail for 30,000 years.

But who said there was justice in America?